You’re probably used to taking it all off when you have sex, but doing the opposite of what you usually do can feel exciting! Here are some sexy ideas to kick your sex life into high gear.

Create a slow, sexy buildup to foreplay and intercourse that will get your pulse racing and your blood pumping. Sixty-nine is one way to take the pressure off of both of you so you can get turned on without feeling any performance pressure. To add a little bit of risk, try having the woman be on top! (Make sure you’re on a very sturdy couch. The woman should be comfortable in case of falls.)

A great way to make a playful change is to swap who’s on top and bottom in the bedroom. Start by taking turns being each other’s sexual partners, switching up your roles every now and then.

Monogamy doesn’t have to be monotonous. Healthy sexual relationships need some tender love and care. Nothing kills a relationship faster than boredom, and that is the real cause of disappointment.

If you’re more comfortable being in charge, take charge of your orgasms. Women can learn how to have an orgasm when they want to, not when they have to. Make sure you’re taking time to connect with your partner, using good eye contact and slow breathing.

Some women think that it’s important for men to be able to have an orgasm fast (and that doesn’t mean they should). Here are three ways some women think they can help their husbands or partners have the same kinds of orgasms they do.

Take your time. Take sex slowly, and make every moment count. (Think of sex as a work of art. Each moment deserves a lot of attention.)

Follow through. Not all men are physically able to have an orgasm quickly. If you’ve done your part, be sure to stay with it until you’re really feeling it. (Don’t abandon the ship before it sinks.)

Be there for him. He probably wants you to stay with him during the entire process. He might even want you to hold him down if he’s trying to thrust too fast. (Once you’ve warmed up for a while, it’s hard to slow down.)

The two of you can probably agree on what feels good and what doesn’t feel good. Communicating is always the best way to improve sex and studies confirm people are more sexually satisfied when they discuss sex. Sex can be an important part of a romantic relationship, but it’s never the only thing you should talk about or spend time with your partner doing.

Plan a date with your partner. Whether you want to go out to dinner and a movie or you would like to go on an evening stroll, scheduling time together is always a good idea.  Even the thought of it may make you hot with anticipation.

Take time to learn new sex positions. You both might be comfortable with the old standbys, but try something different for a change.

Get some new sexy lingerie, or add some flashy accessories. You may not have any idea what to do with a feather boa, but it looks really nice and can add a lot of charm to an evening when the two of you are in bed together.

Buy each other sexy things you know the other person would like. One thing millennials don’t talk about as much as their parents’ generation is “shopping for sex. ” But, like it or not, buying each other gifts is part of that tradition.

You might be curious about what your partner does when you aren’t around. The traditional “when my spouse isn’t home” mentality still exists today in many relationships. It’s perfectly normal to be curious about what your partner does when you’re not around because no one wants to think of their partner cheating on them.

Add some sweet talk into the bedroom. A little sweet talk can go a long way.

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